The Cancer of Unforgiveness

I know a few people, who are near and dear to me, who are simply put "miserable". It breaks my heart when someone I love is unable to move forward in life because they won't let go of past pain. If you can tell a story about how you were wronged last month, last year, five, even 10 years ago with the same vehemence, anger and ire, then you have not let go of it! What happened has happened. What was done is done. Over, finis.

One of the most dangerous things a person can do is to hold onto resentment. Clinging to unforgiveness has far-reaching and often unexpected consequences, emotionally, mentally, spiritually AND physically.

Although bitterness takes root in the mind, it doesn't stay contained. Bitterness can spread into every aspect of a person's life and effect EVERY relationship you will ever have.

It probably does not surprise you to hear that resentment impacts the mind and spirit, but you may not have realized what a physical toll it can also take on us. An attitude of bitterness ratchets up tension and anxiety, which can affect everything from muscles to chemical balance in the brain. Over time, that kind of mayhem weakens the body and can literally make you sick. It is a metaphorical cancer.

Because unforgiveness is a violation of God's law, it also causes spiritual turmoil that hinders a believer's growth. Prayer is stifled because of harbored sin that should be confessed. And worship is dry and hypocritical because it's difficult to effectively honor the Lord while trying to justify or hide a wrong attitude. What's more, a resentful person's witness is damaged, as others are prevented from seeing God's glory shining through him.

Forgiving someone means giving up resentment and the right to get even with him or her, even though you were wronged. God insisted this was the only way to go through life. One reason He commands us to forego hostility and vengeance is that these things cause so much damage to our own lives. I have said it before but feel it needs repeating- forgiveness is something you have to be willing to give even if you are never asked or hear those words “I am sorry” or “Please forgive me”. It is an act of love, grace and mercy, one we would hope others would give to us.

No matter who you are or how much you have you will never be happy, peaceful, or content by harboring an unforgiving spirit. Holding on to resentment is like saying, “Lock the bars on my prison cell, tie my hands and feet, and harden my heart, because I don’t want to live a full life”. You will never live freely or fully so long as you refuse to deal with the roots of your bitterness.

I know I have posted about forgiveness before, but when the pain of unforgiveness hits close to home, my heart cries out breaking because I am a living testimony to the healing power of forgiveness. Forgiveness isn’t a request it is a requirement: Mathew 6:15 “If you do not forgive …, my Father will not forgive you …”