This is NOT me...............

Do you ever feel like you are on the verge of just losing it? Truth is, I am struggling. I don't know if it's hormones, or that things have finally piled up high enough that I feel like I am drowning. Maybe both.

 I don't know how I got here, or when it began to spiral to an emotional low, I just know I am here. It's takes all I have lately just to do what HAS to be done, trying not to get overwhelmed with everything that should get done and trying not to get upset with the fact that I should NOT have to do it all.   I work from home so getting dressed is optional. I live with 3 people, yet I spend most of my time alone, and lately, when they are around, I still feel alone. I don't like to get dressed to go out of the house unless I have to, I just feel like I don't have enough energy for myself, much less anyone else.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

I spend more time reading my bible then I ever have. I have been faithful with my daily reading in the One year Bible. I even started a new Bible study. So how can the rest of me feel so BLAH?

I have had enough experience with depression and anxiety to recognize it others, but I can't be depressed, my family depends on my 'sunshine' to keep their own depression and anxiety at bay. I am the knot in their ropes, their "the glass if half full". I can't be here, I don't want to be here.

I need your prayers. I need you to be the knot in my rope. I know that I have God, and that He is forever faithful, and that I am not alone, but I am not myself and I need to be, and I need to figure out how to get back to me.

Can you, will you, pray for me?